Patty Mills 25 Points Full Highlights (1/27/2020)

I'm too unintelligent/lazy to figure out which players have been on their current teams for the longest stretch of time, but just by thinking about it for a while, I've come to the conclusion that Patty Mills has been on the Spurs longer than most players have been on their current teams. In fact, I would say that Mills, who has been on the Spurs for nine years, is at least top ten currently in terms of longest tenures. He might even be top five. As I said, I don't know of any way to look up this stat and trying to use my brain to figure out is something that I don't really feel like doing right now.

Mills is rewarding the Spurs for their loyalty to him (or is it his loyalty to them?) by averaging the most PPG per game of his career, 11.4. He's also averaging a career low in assists per game (if you adjust for minutes played), but that's the tradeoff you have to make when you ask him to do a bit more scoring. Besides, he's not out there to get assists. There are other players on the Spurs who are supposed to be getting assists. Mills is out there to hit triples while the commentators deliriously repeat tired pseudo-Australian phrases to the chagrin of true Australians everywhere.

Speaking of true Australians, can any of the true Australians out there hook me up with a wallaby? All you have to do is go outside in your backyard, catch one of the five or ten that are hopping around out there at all hours of the day, and then mail it to me here in America so it can be my pet. I promise you will be paid handsomely for your efforts. You'll get a 10% cut of Patreon earnings. Just don't tell the Aussie police or they'll deport me there and then throw me in prison and force-feed me disgusting Tim-Tams.

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